
He’s allowed to use his cell phone once a week. Every Sunday, the phones are distributed to the recruits, and they’re given a small amount of time to talk to loved ones and trade dirty texts (if they’ve got the balls). Small amount really does mean small, though. Finn’s last call with his mom lasted six and a half minutes before he had to rush out a ‘I love you, see you soon!’ prior to the phone being pulled from his hands.
It’s all about discipline, alright, but it still sucks.
Some of the guys he’s shacked up with use their time to check Facebook. Apparently it’s more convenient to post a new status update (to save on time and stuff), and he gets that, in a sense. He thinks of all the friends he could reach on the site, like Puck and Mike and Sam, but whenever he finds himself opening up the app, he freezes.
There’s a chance he’ll see an update from Santana who, last he heard from Kurt, had moved to the Big Apple to pursue some kind of dream. No thanks.
There’s a chance he’ll see an update from Quinn, and since she has a certain pass that allows her to see a certain someone, he’s been trying to avoid thinking about the blonde and her new best friend.
There’s also a really big chance he’ll see an update from his ex-fiancée. No matter how much he misses her, he figures it’s easier just to forget she exists.
Yeah, it’s as stupid as it sounds. It doesn’t help that when he isn’t focusing on push ups and assault courses, his mind is on the time he got to spend with her, the duets and jokes and love making.
He wants to be able to keep a clear head and push all of that stuff aside, but it’s not easy when you’re separated from the girl you love more than anyone else in the world. He’s thought about writing, about calling, but he doesn’t wanna make the wound any deeper. He can’t do it, not right now, not when he still wakes up in the middle of the night in tears.
Except this Sunday is different. He feels a pang, a lonely, grating pang, and when he’s given his cell phone, he logs into Facebook and holds his breath. Mike had a Skype date with Tina. Puck found a dead raccoon in someone’s pool. Brittany’s got a new cat. Rachel’s been on her first date in New York.
He blinks, gulps, rubs his eyes and clutches his chest as he re-reads her status. It’s simple, to the point, and he doesn’t want to read any further.
Santana asks her how it went; ‘pleasant’. The kid, whoever he may be, bought her flowers.
He turns his cell off before Santana replies because he doesn’t need to see her ask about the kissing or the groping or the sex. Rachel’s in New York, pursuing her dream, living her life, moving on.
It’s all he’s ever wanted for her.
His broken heart is just a side effect.